Αlso visit my blog … affiliates definition

Armenians still haven’t learned to look inwards.

I’m not replying again because there’s no point. I’m not changing your mind, clearly, and you’re not changing mine. Please don’t read this site if the content bothers you.

It’s really sad, and a testament to the inferiority complex that Armenians have that you’ve decided to concentrate on a section of my site that’s meant to be funny. I did not say them, others did. I’m not going to censor myself or what I post here in an effort to not offend Armenians who can’t step back and laugh at themselves once in a while. If you’re going to get offended at light-hearted commentary about fashion and appearance, I don’t know what else to say.

If you want sugar-coated news and commentary, you’re free to visit any of the other politically-controlled Armenian newspapers out there. The fact that you made that blanket statement, makes it clear that you haven’t read the almost 200 articles and posts available on this site. Again, you’re free to go elsewhere if this isn’t your cup of tea.

As I said before, we can just agree to disagree.

As far as this post – those are quotes found online said by OTHER people. Not me. I find these comments funny, yes. I don’t take them seriously for the most part. It’s all in good fun, and there’s no reason to pick them apart. We don’t have to be defensive about everything and anything ever said about Armenians. And yes I’ve showed my mother, she laughed too. Thanks for the link to Ashley’s blog. If you search around this site, you’ll see articles from her. We connected through this site and I consider her a good friend.

I guess we’ll just have to agree to disagree.

Yes, we set expectations on men too – you’re right. While much of my opinion writing on this site in terms of gender roles focuses on women, I wholeheartedly agree that as a culture (and larger society), men are subjected to gender role assignment as well. I’d like to write about this in the future.

For us to understand domestic violence, we have to understand its underlying causes. In my opinion, expectations placed on gender roles, especially in cultures like ours, do have a hand in contributing to violence. Why should a woman experience domestic violence at the hand of her husband (and mother-in-law) and be killed as a result, even AFTER she has gone to authorities to tell them about the abuse she is suffering. Why is an Armenian authority, as her relatives claim, under the impression that the fact she was beaten is “not important.” Why? Because there are deep rooted idealogies and expectations attached to her gender. She should be modest. Why is she complaining? She should be a good listener, why wont she do what I tell her?

Furthermore, the issue I see here is not what kind of expectations are discussed, the issue is the idea that a woman is expected to be any or all of these things, and if she’s not, people wonder, as the blogger noted, “what’s wrong with her?” How come a divorced woman in Armenia is viewed as “ruined?” and offered little to no assistance? Because she failed. She failed to live up to the weight the world has put on her shoulders.
Is a man ever thought of as ruined because he is divorced? Is a man who has had sex before marriage considered ruined, like a woman is? No, his conquests are celebrated.

I appreciate your involvement in domestic violence and the discussion you’re providing. I also believe that we need to examine what leads to domestic violence as well as emotional abuse and discrimination, rather than just concentrating on the fact that these abuses occur.

There are a lot of amazing strong Armenian women (and men) who are defying and breaking free of these role assignments every day, but that does not deter from the fact that there is still a problem in Armenian culture when it comes to dealing with these issues.

And as for the coming generation, it’s not what I’m writing that is perpetuating anything – my goals and intentions are to bring light to issues, nothing more and nothing less. But according to one 21-year-old young man who messaged me, I’m “burning the name of Armenians” because apparently, I’ve had the audacity to write about Armenian girls liking sex and doing it before marriage, because according to him, no Armenian girl OUTSIDE of the United States has sex before marriage. None. And those that do only exist in the United States. Expectations, from a member of the new generation, revealed.

While I’d like to address all your points, I’m going to keep it to one, for now:

And second, this has been a predominant theme in the WRC and ianyan, which I do not find healthy for the coming generation: Armenian women are expected to be bland roll over twigs that break at the sound of a man’s voice.

The WRC (Women’s Resource Center) works in the area of women’s human rights, reproductive and sexual rights, sexual violence and women’s role in the conflict resolution and peace building in the region of South Caucasus, thus you will find the gender role expectations enforced on women – which potentially lead to discrimination, harassment and even abuse a “theme” that they will always deal with as long as they are in existence. In terms of ianyan, the only reason you see it as a theme here is not only because people (including myself) have an interest in writing about it, it’s because there are no other Armenian publications actively exploring an issue that affects women in our ethnic community. The reason you’re seeing it here frequently and by other contributors (see links below) is because they are issues that exist in this community, issues that have been ignored for too long and set aside for news about a new church opening in some section of the diaspora or another column about the genocide. These are the issues that directly affect our community today. We just have the freedom here, on this humble space, to bring it to you.

What I find most disturbing about the comments on various articles that deal with women’s issues on this site is that all of them are from men, who either a) call me a fem-nazi looney or raving feminist or b) really believe that these issues do not exist and aren’t talking points in our culture. The latter is the saddest.

You say, “What kind of world would we live in if we DIDN’T have these expectations for women (and others for men)”

A better one. Seriously.

http://www.ianyanmag.com/2010/03/30/experiences-as-an-armenian-woman-international-womens-month/

http://www.ianyanmag.com/2010/03/18/what-it-means-to-be-a-woman-international-womens-month/

http://www.ianyanmag.com/2010/03/20/queerarmenian-split-identity-international-womens-month/